Peoples Republic of South Devon

Short, sharp Shop

March 9th, 2006

Strong words from the Herald Express this week as it launches its catchily-titled Shop A Thug campaign.
The rag is disgusted with the recent attacks on innocent people in Torquay and Paignton, observing that “incidents of teenage thuggery, anti-social behaviour, vandalism and general nuisance-related crime are becoming more common”.
The emotive editorial goes on to recount the story of how a woman pleading for mercy saved two men as “a gang of crazed hoodies cold-bloodedly laid into them in Plainmoor”.
The paper insists: “There is little doubt the men could have been murdered.”
Of course, using that logic you could also add there was little doubt they could have been saved by aliens shooting lasers from their fingers.
But hence the new initiative, aimed at “ridding the streets of these morons once and for all”.
How will it work? Well, concerned citizens wanting to grass up the rascal who lives down the lane should call the paper’s (premium rate?) hotline, leave a poisonous and hate-filled message, and all the details will be “passed on”.
But don’t have nightmares, folks. The article admits that: “we are not saying the streets are infested with hoodlums intent on causing mayhem.
“But there are gangs out there who think they rule the roost and it’s time to give them a rude awakening.”
We say, bring back flogging. Go on, punks - make our day.

Posted by Thin White Duke

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