Peoples Republic of South Devon

Febrile Fitz # 8

Bonjour, and welcome to another peer into David ‘Fitz’ Fitzgerald’s ear – the ex-personal assistant to Gus Honeybun cum Evening Herald scribbler.

This week’s effort features an appearance by The Enemy (his wife) and is a good column for fans of Rainman-like observations on hamsters and ice cream. Coo, Fitz’s columns must pretty much write themselves, mustn’t they? Insane in the membrane – insane in the brain.

FEBRILE FITZ # 8

ONE BUNNYHOP: “My home office has a rather unpleasant smell about it. The Enemy had agreed to look after a friend’s hamster with fur odour. The pet shop looked blank when I asked for a rodent power shower.”

TWO BUNNYHOPS: “It’s rammed into his tiny pink plastic hut. All I can see is its nose, at least I hope it’s a nose! ”

THREE BUNNYHOPS: “Ice cream van chimes, they haven’t changed for generations.”

FOUR BUNNYHOPS: “Surely there must be a government body that can bring Mr Whippy up to date. I’m not suggesting Boom Base, Slap Your Bitch Up, Bling Funk In’it by Pooper Scooper Dog Dog, just something a little more with it, man!”

FIVE BUNNYHOPS: “Now let me state this clearly. I have never, nor will I ever try drugs.”

Oh but Fitz you really should because you are, as ever, a one.
Bye children.
Posted by Thin White Duke

September 5th, 2006

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Nine days in September, October . . .

The firsts of that South Devon spectacular Nine Days of Art are set to kick off in Teignbridge and West Devon on September 9. In Teignbridge more than 80 artists are opening up their studios, and themselves if I know artists, in more that 50 locations throughout the district until 17th.

That’s nine a day with one left over for all you youngsters still fresh the success of attaining your maths A-level (you’d need a degree in applied maths to work out how many locations that is, all I can say is that it’s more than five and fewer than six).

Wouldn’t it be handy to be able to work out your itinerary over the internet, ahh you can always dream - these are council-backed artists after all. Your best bet is to pick up a leaflet (which also includes a map and is far handier than a computer in car, on bus or while riding a bicycle).

Or, for West Devon, download the pdf. (Although those guys only have 39 artists in 29 venues. So, if you started exploring art at a rate of three a day and you met a fly from Crewe appreciating art at a greater speed, how many venues would you have visited on impact - who says educational standards have gone down?)

And while we’re on the subject, and before I forget, the South Hams event is 21-29 October, and Exeter’s is 4-5 November (now, maybe their nine days were indeed planned by an A-level maths student, or maybe it’s just an unhappy mix between arts and the mother of all sciences. Then again Teinbridge is having a veritable fortnight of events under that nine days banner).

Posted by Cptn

September 5th, 2006

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