Special Christmas message to the people of South Devon (and beyond)

By PRSD, on Thursday, December 25, 2008

This year the People’s Republic of South Devon Christmas message is brought to you by the South Devon Humanists…

This Humanist Christmas Message comes in two parts. Please delete the part that least applies:

By now we should have heard the annual call to arms: ‘Put Christ back into Christmas!’
However, Christmas has long been both religious and secular, just a jumble of ancient customs and more recent inventions. We all know that December 25 was already a pagan holiday long before Christ but, while many of us no longer believe in the existence of a God, that shouldn’t stop us from being moved by messages of peace and goodwill.

Indeed, perhaps Christmas has now returned to it pagan roots, as a time of debauchery, excess and hope for the future..

So, for those of us who aren’t religious, there are many non-Christian elements in Christmas to celebrate.

There’s also plenty of good traditions and habits that, now stripped of their religious meaning, have at their core the real need for a winter holiday – the gift giving, the lights, the parties, the tidings of peace and good will, that kind of thing.

It’s fun to celebrate the festive and warm aspects of Christmas, while joining the growing number of people in South Devon who have left religious superstition behind.

Merry Christmas from South Devon’s Humanists!

· Christmas is about being confined in the same room with people you wouldn’t voluntarily spend two days with, due to their being related to you in some way.

· This one day will need to be paid for during the following six months.

· You are a vegetarian and normally avoid carcasses.

· Christmas Specials of comedy classics, such as My Family

· You don’t know 100 people, so who are these mass-produced cards from?

· It won’t fit, you won’t like it, but you’ll have to wear/use it anyway.

· A Christmas Greeting from your Bank or Building Society does not make everything all right

· If you wanted to go to a party, you would not necessarily choose to have one in the place you work, with the people you work with.

· Your initial liking for Slade, Mud and Jonah Lewie has diminished since mid-October.

· You work in The Willows so you hear the above classics 8 hours a day for three months of the year.

· You’ve had a VCR or a DVD player for a number of years now, so no longer look forward to the Big Christmas Movie, despite the enthusiasm of the nice lady on Westcountry TV.

· You just know Steve McQueen won’t make it over that fence, but get quite excited anyway.

· Party poppers, Christmas crackers and plastic antlers are not amusing in any way.

· You feel a mixture of pity and admiration for the Tinsel & Turkey coach loads who manage to extend Christmas Day for 5 months.

· There’s only 364 shopping days ‘till next Christmas.