Some marriages last a lifetime, however, others don’t work out and a couple can decide to end their relationship by means of a divorce. Although divorce is often a solution to an unhappy marriage, the process itself can be very sad and stressful.
However, the burden and stress of divorce doesn’t just fall on the shoulders of those who are separating, if any children are involved in the divorce then they too can be heavily affected. Finding advice on divorce from experts is important for every party, so how can you make a separation as easy as possible?
The divorce rate in the UK is on the rise, just in 2010 the rate of divorce increased by almost 5% compared to the previous year. However, while the rate of divorce may be rising, the age at which a marriage ends is on the fall. In 1970, only 22% of marriages ended in divorce before a pair endured their 15th year as a married couple, however, just two years ago, this figure had risen to 33%.
This rise in divorce rates and fall in the average age at which a marriage is officially annulled means that the number of children having to deal with the effects of divorce is on the up.
Children are the innocent party in a failed marriage. There were around 20,000 divorces last year, of which almost all were accounted for by adultery, behaviour, desertion or separation. Not one case cited children as a cause of divorce. This is why you have such a strong moral obligation to your child to protect them from the adverse effects of a failed marriage.
Protecting your children
Although they may not vocalise their concerns, children are invariably affected by divorce. By holding in their feelings they can actually risk their health, with a lot of stress related illnesses associated with children whose parents are divorced or in the process of divorcing.
To protect your child suffering from any adverse health effects as a result of your divorce, it can help to make sure that you are doing the following:
- Talk openly and honestly about your divorce with your child. This may be difficult but it will allow your child to open up about any concerns they have.
- Be civil with your partner, even if you’re angry. It’s important to remain calm when discussing any relationship problems with your partner, especially in front of a child. Displaying anger can make the situation very traumatic for a child.
- Try to observe any changes in the eating or sleeping habits of your child. If any habitual habits appear to have been disturbed, this may be a sign that the child is being adversely affected by the divorce, at which point it may be time to seek medical and psychiatric help for the little one.
By keeping your divorce as trauma free as possible, you should ensure that your child has a good chance of moving on from the potentially difficult period in their life trouble free.